


Secrets

by TricksterxArchangel



Category: MCU, Thor - Fandom
Genre: Gen, Growing Up, M/M, Pining from afar (near), Teen Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-13
Updated: 2019-01-13
Packaged: 2019-10-09 17:42:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17411369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TricksterxArchangel/pseuds/TricksterxArchangel
Summary: Everyone has secrets. The question is, how long can everyone keep them?





	Secrets

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Nikolaus_Chaser](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nikolaus_Chaser/gifts).



Prologue

Asgard and Jotunheim had been at war for many long years causing Odin to miss many of his son's memorable first milestones; all he wanted was for the fighting to end. Laufey-King and his consort, Fárbauti were formidable upon the battlefield. It wasn’t until Fárbauti suddenly took his leave that the army of Asgard began to make gains. 

Then one night there was a terrible blizzard, thunder and lighting rang across the sky. Laufey-King left his people in the midst of battle and Odin saw his chance. The Casket of Ancient Winters was Odin’s, and victory was in the hands of his people.

Hours too late Laufey-King returned to lead his Army, a much-weakened Fárbauti at his side. His consort was gaunt and pale, he looked as though Odin’s wee son, Thor could knock him over with his tiny wooden sword. A peace treaty of sorts was signed and as Asgard’s army rejoiced to be going home, Laufey-King carried his consort home to their frozen palace of ice; he was losing a great amount of blood from a curiously placed wound Odin noted. The Jotnar wore little by way of clothing, the cold didn’t bother them. However Fárbauti was wearing a knee-length tunic and furs about his upper body, and it did little to hide his loss of muscle. It appeared as though a spear had lanced up the inside of his leg, for he was losing a great deal of blood and Laufey-King gave Odin one last withering look as they left. Fárbauti gave an almost pleading look over his king’s shoulder before passing out.

Odin walked back through the encampment of Asgardians as they began the process of returning home through the Bifrost, however it was a slow process and he was determined to be the last to go home. As he walked slowly through the camp and up through the hills into the low craigs he heard the wind wailing through the rocks. It reminded him of Thor when he was very little, and as he continued he realized it was _indeed_ a babe. His footsteps began to hurry. It was not unheard of for a shieldmaiden to give birth whilst at war, though usually they were in camp. 

He suddenly came upon a Jotnar shrine, and in the middle a cold, stone altar, with the tiniest Jotnar babe he’d ever seen, shivering, and naked in the cold. His one good eye went wide in shock as he recognized the mixture of heritage lines on the babe’s face, _Laufey_ and _Fárbauti_. That was _why_ Fárbauti had disappeared all those months ago, he had been with child. He had borne a runt, and Laufey had left him here to perish. 

Gently Odin picked the babe up, for Jotun or not this was an innocent babe. The babe’s arms continued to flail feebly and his jewel red eyes locked onto Odin. Even as fat tears rolled down his cheeks his skin began to change from a dusky blue to a healthy Asgardian peachy-pink making Odin chuckle. 

“Aren’t you a cheeky little trickster?” His thumb caressed the babe’s plump cheek. “Little Loki, humm? Come, let’s get you warmed up and some food in your belly…” Already Odin was thinking many years ahead. This babe, christened ‘Loki’ by Odin’s own tongue, was clearly a runt for a Frost Giant, the size of an Aesir, perhaps smaller even than Thor. Having gotten a look at him before he shifted, he was likely able to bear children as Fárbauti was. A marriage between Thor and Loki could be advantageous for both kingdoms. 

“Can’t have you meeting Frigga and Thor on an empty stomach…” Little Loki cooed as he was wrapped in Odin’s cape as he was carried back to camp. 

The Crown Prince of Jotunheim was the greatest treasure lost in the war with Asgard, except no one knew he lived. Fárbauti prayed, but that was all he could do. The babe was a runt, there would have been no bones left behind to bury, even if Laufey had allowed such a thing. 

The All-Father was the last Asgardian to come home on the Bifrost, and hidden from all but the Watcher was the babe, Loki. When he entered his private, family chambers he let his magic fall and Frigga gasped at the sight of the tiny babe that suddenly screamed for a mother’s touch. 

However it was Thor running into their rooms, hugging first Odin and then looking the at babe in Frigga’s arms. “The Gods have given me a brother!” He cried excitedly, reaching a hand out towards the screaming infant. Before Odin or Frigga could correct him, Loki grasped Thor’s hand tightly, and his wailing finally stopped. Frigga looked over the heads of her boys at Odin and dared him to correct Thor. 

The All-Father wisely held his tongue. 

Jotunheim slowly withered while Loki thrived. He still had a king for a father. He gained a queen of a mother who loved him so much it was nearly a tangible thing and Thor, a big brother who vowed to fight all his battles for him and never leave his side. A brother who loved him with a heart of a crown prince intended to be his betrothed, unbeknownst to both boys. 

Some 500 or So Years Later

Loki woke to the sound of his brother running through their halls towards his bedchamber. It was late, especially for him to be abed, and with a groan he realized why as his hand slid to his belly. He was bleeding. How he _hated_ it! It only happened four times a year, once a season, but it was uncomfortable in many ways. Thus far only Mother knew, he was too scared to tell Thor, though he suspected Father knew. The way he looked at him sometimes, as though his one eye was truly all-seeing. Of course there was Heimdall to consider as well, but he was afraid he’d go mad if he put too much thought into it, so he simply didn’t.

That brought him back to Thor skidding past his door and then opening it and rushing in and closing it. “Brother! Are you nearly ready? We’re to leave soon!” Thor’s voice rang through Loki’s room and about halfway through he realized the curtains were still drawn and it was dark and quiet. “Brother…?! Loki…!? Forgive me...a—are you not well? Should I get a Healer…?” 

“No, you Great Oaf, I need no Healer!” Loki snapped, for it was true. In reality there was nothing _‘wrong’_ with Loki, or so Mother would spend hours telling him as she sat at her loom while he read at her feet when this curse first began, two hundred and fifty or so years ago.

He rolled his eyes at Thor’s wounded look, then he smirked. “I’m fine, I entertained a lovely young lady last night; clearly we had too much sweet wine as I am still abed. My head hurts as does my belly, I just need more sleep—“

Thor’s face paled slightly when Loki mentioned entertaining a young lady. Gray clouds began to scud across the sky and his jaw tensed; perhaps this ‘Lady’ had tried to poison his little brother? He would find her and make her pay, ‘Lady’ or not! Still, best not to lay all those cards on the table…”But our hunt! We’re to leave in under an hour!” He whined like a little boy of one hundred.

Loki sighed, flopping back amongst his many pillows. He was in much pain, and just wanted Thor gone so he could take a bath and change his bed linens. “The Norns take our hunt, Thor; I’m hungover! Now go before I decide to empty my stomach on your boots! Take one of your insufferable friends.” He croaked, his fingers kneading his belly, eyes closing. 

“B—But this was to be _our_ hunt!” Thor whined. “I don’t _want_ to take any of the Warriors Three! And Sif should be bleeding, I would not ask her to go.” 

Loki’s eyes snapped open, “How do _you_ know something so _intimate_ of the Lady Sif?” He sneered. 

Thor blushes, “Well, I don’t think she _likes_ it being known, but simply from being close comrades-in-arms. And I think just by virtue of being a fertility god…” He shrugged, embarrassed. “I um...I generally know when _someone_ can become with child…but it is before she bleeds...” He shrugged and stood awkwardly. “I—I’ll head out, if you feel better and I’m still not back, _please_ , join me…” He gave Loki his most pleading look.

Loki rolled his eyes, growling, any other time he would have relished Thor’s discomfort over their topic of conversation. Now he simply wanted him _gone_. “Yes, yes, I’ll see what I can do...you know how much I enjoy the slaying of beasts...go on you Mighty Oaf…think of it this way, now you get my share of the food as well...” 

Thor gave a weak smile. “Who knew I would live to see the day my thorny little brother thought of someone else first?” He smirked as Loki hurled his least favorite pillow at him. “All right! I’m going! I’ll bring you back something glorious!” And with that, Thor was gone. 

Loki was thankful, he was able to gather his sheets up and make it to his bathing chamber. He only bled once a season, but it tended to be heavy and quite painful for him. He filled his deep bath with cold water and sank in with a sigh. The cold seemed to leech the pain away and relax him. The one time Mother tried heat for his pains; it increased them nearly a hundredfold and he passed out. He had finally woken up in an ice bath, a very worried Frigga and Odin watching over him, it was Father’s quick thinking that had thought of the ice, though Mother swore he knew not the reason of Loki’s needing it. 

Loki spent the next week mostly in his chambers. When he wasn’t in his bed he was lounging in cold baths or eating chilled fruit that Frigga brought him. He knew Thor was hoping for Loki to join him, but there was no way he would be.

Thor’s hunt lasted two and a half weeks, though Loki was sure his brother could have been done with it in four days. Clearly Thor had been waiting for Loki to join him, but that did not happen. As the days stretched on, the weather became increasingly darker until the day the Thunderer returned home in the midst of a heavy downpour. The spoils of his hunt had been sent to the kitchens, the skins to the tannery. 

The Crown Prince did not bother to see his mother or his father. Neither Odin nor Frigga would thank him for tracking great clumps of mud into their private sitting rooms. So instead he went straight to Loki’s chambers. He was hurt that his brother had not made the effort to join their hunt, especially as it had been intended to be _their_ hunt in the first place. A low rumble of thunder in the distance was Loki’s only warning before Thor was barging into his rooms. 

Loki was halfway to his bathing chamber when the door slammed open. His face was pale, dark circles under his eyes that looked like blue smudges. He startled and turned, glaring at Thor. “I _know_ Mother taught you better than that. Or have you gone feral in your time away?” He snapped, annoyed that Thor would come in without even giving him time to cast a glamor. 

“You did not come.” Thor growled, slamming the door closed behind him, the heavy wood shaking in the frame. “I waited days for you.” He stalked across the bedchamber like a wild beast, his wet hair sticking to his face.

Loki gave a little squeak and backed up until he was pressed against the wall. He’d never seen Thor quite like this before, he actually seemed... _hurt_ that he’d never joined him. It was just a stupid hunting trip. It wasn’t like they’d never gone on hunting trips before, or wouldn’t again. “ _Thor_. Get ahold of yourself, you’re acting like a fool. I simply didn’t expect you wait for—!”

Thor’s hand came up to cup the back of Loki’s skull, a gesture he had not done in awhile. “Why? Have you spent all this time abed with your mystery Lady?” He asked quietly, his voice hurt. 

“W—What?! No!” He spluttered, shocked by Thor’s blunt question. “I haven’t been feeling well, that’s all. Ask Mother if you like!” He glared, daring the young god to do so. “Now, if you don’t mind, I was just on my way to take a bath, which I suggest you go do as well. You look like a drowned bilgesnipe.” He ducked down under Thor’s massive arm and continued to his bathing chamber where his tub was full of cool water. He tossed his robe aside as he sunk into the water, sighing in pleasure. 

Thor’s eyes tracked Loki, watching his every move. “Why thank you for the generous invitation, I’d love to join you.” He smirked as he began to drop bits and pieces of his armor, then his clothing before he started down the steps into Loki’s bath. He failed to notice Loki’s horrified expression. When his feet hit the cold water he screeched aloud. “Bloody Hel, Loki! No wonder you don’t feel well! Are you _trying_ to freeze your balls off!? This water is frigid!” He looked at his brother in question. 

Loki glared at Thor. “I find it quite comfortable, and you can either join me; or leave,” he snarled.

Thor grit his teeth, but continued into the water. He stayed for a good forty-five minutes, washing his hair and sudsing up his body and rinsing off. Finally he had to admit defeat and retreat from the water, nearly shivering. The silent treatment from Loki didn’t help matters. He wrapped one of Loki’s sumptuous green towels around his body, and it was _almost_ big enough for him. “Thank you for your hospitality, I hope you’ll join us at dinner tonight. It will be fresh-caught mountain trout, I only caught it this morning.” 

Loki refused to look at Thor, instead he magicked a little mountain trout of his own; and sent it swimming through his bath. “Thank yourself for my hospitality,” he growled softly. 

“Brother, _please_.” Thor sounded contrite, he looked to Loki with puppy eyes. 

“I shall see how I feel. Now begone,” he hissed.

Thor nodded and grabbed his clothing and hurried out. He needed to go to his own bathing chamber to warm up before going to see his mother. He needed to know what was wrong with Loki.

**Author's Note:**

> I’d like to thank KTSpree13 for hosting the Thorki Secret Santa, & i’d Like to thank Nikolaus_Chaser for their increadable patience! You’ve likely given up on me (& I wouldn’t have blamed you)! But your patience shall be rewarded as there is more story to tell here! Just bear with me!
> 
> I would also like to thank Spacecrazyartist for beta reading & editing this! Your input was so valuable & I appreciate your enthusiasm, it helped so much when I doubted myself!


End file.
